Bio Dome
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- Written by KTP
Bio-Dome: Any love for California created from Point Break was destroyed by Pauly Shore.
The true story of Biosphere 2’s scientific failure is fascinating on its own. It was designed as a self-sustaining ecosystem complete with insects, animals, and agriculture sealed off from the rest of the world in an attempt to see if the colonization of Mars was possible. Disaster started from the get go. There were problems sustaining oxygen due to the concrete actually absorbing it. A majority of the insect population died off with the rise of an indigenous species of ants and cockroaches. The crew wasn’t able to sustain their food production and had to kill off their livestock who were becoming competition for existing food stores. Social tensions within the group split them within six months to the point where they were barely able to work together. To further compliment a massive shit show, two members of the of the first mission tried to break out the crew of the second mission only to find out they never wanted out to begin with now that the second team was armed with competent management and researchers. It’s sad really that instead of making a film chronicling this massive $150 million fuck up, they chose instead to showcase a fucking moron prancing around for an hour and a half speaking mongoloid.
What the fuck man? You go straight from The Usual Suspects to this?
Bud and Doyle (Pauly Shore and Stephen Baldwin) are two morons that will do whatever it takes to not partake in their girlfriends’ Earth Day clean-up activities. The girls find out that the two tricked them to get out of a cleanup, they have a fight, blah-blah-blah, and Bud and Doyle get stuck in the Bio-Dome. The two proceed to use their fuck-up circus antics to botch the scientists work and be overall obnoxious assholes for their entire stay. The scale of fuck-ups progresses higher and higher to the point where a massive party effectively trashes the complex and experiment. They then proceed to reverse engineer their faux pas by cleaning up the place and, well, that’s it.
The scientist, of course, play the straight faces in the film. In the real life Biosphere 2, they actually had crew members named Gaia and Laser. I wonder why it failed...
It’s easy to throw hate at Pauly Shore for being Pauly Shore. His Cali shit-speak persona may be the actual embodiment of why everyone hated the state of California to being with, but as a kid, it was an embarrassingly guilty pleasure. Watching someone act like a retarded asshole and get rewarded like Adam Sandler is kind of an endearing theme in Hollywood. Really, the biggest offense is Stephen Baldwin who, as an actor, should have fucking known better. He plays Shore’s empowering side kick, accenting the shit-speak with fart sniffing and eating bugs all while rocking cargo shorts and hair like he was a Korn groupie. If Shore reminded us of the absurdity of California, Baldwin is the tabernacle of shitty 90’s fashion.
You want a girlfriend as hot as 90's Joey Lauren Adams? Act like a Teletubby high on meth.
Bio-Dome didn’t really kill Pauly Shore’s career, but served as an exclamation point to his five film shit streak. It’s remembered as a guilty pleasure or an embarrassment by most, like No-Fear shirts and Limp Bizkit. I guess it was par for course in the 90s with highlights showcasing Kazaam, Batman and Robin, and Cool as Ice. I suppose this was probably a good thing in the long run. If your multi-million dollar scientific experiment goes tits up, at least it will only be remembered as the place where that shitty Pauly Shore movie was made.
